Friday, October 31, 2003

HairM salon for Men from Celeste

In the Willie Week . What the article doesn't mention is how smokin' our friend Celeste is...

"At the other end of the brush is Celeste Trapp's HairM Grooming Salon. HairM is more exclusive--50 percent more, to be exact, as it's Portland's first men-only modern salon. But banish those visions of a barbershop full of stag magazines and Spike TV broadcasts.

Even though it sounds like a haircutting version of Hooters, HairM is all class.

The salon recently settled into its new Waterfront digs in a former nightclub. Designing the reception area as a bar (serving draft beer and wine), Trapp has also suspended satellite televisions at each station to display can't-miss sporting events. And yes, there are men's magazines to flip through at this stripper-ish-sounding salon--but nothing spicier than Maxim."

Thursday, October 30, 2003

weird random space sex words

From .

"An audience member asked space architect Constance Adams at the PopTech convention about sex is space (within the context of designing habitats for procreation), and she indicated that erections in space are difficult to achieve because in zero gravity, blood tends to collect in the head and feet."

random cool words

from a review of the Distillers new CD 'Coral Fang' which has been garnering rave reviews everywhere (NME, Rolling Stone, etc.)

[Singer Brody Calle] lives her life not in black and white, but black and red. Hatred and devotion, nihilism and heartbreak, death and anger.

Monday, October 27, 2003

Oregon Dairy Farmers

My work's been posted online, here.

Note: Eric Samsel wrote the first headline, I wrote the second.

Friday, October 24, 2003

Elliot Smith

My friend, Jgo went to school with Elliot Smith, who passed away yesterday.

This cartoon seemed appropriate. Many thanks to explodingdog for putting a little humor in life's twists and turns.

From a burner friend

Side note: I'm going to NYC for their decompression party. Kickass.

"Try this: go to ; open up at least 15 instances of the site one after another. You'll have an out-of-body experience. Trust me."


Had a dream last night that I was at a job interview. I was close to getting the job, but then somebody came in and started making fun of me having a blog.

"Big deal. You cut and paste articles off of the Internet," he scoffed. "And for this, we should hire you?"

Later, I took a long range sniper rifle of his and used it to blow my brains out. That'll teach him.

Work is not fun.

From the Sydney Herald via

Don't mention fun

A 30-year-old German businesswoman is leading a revolution against management gurus, insisting her staff wear uniforms and banning private phone calls and words such as "flexitime" and "team spirit".

Der Spiegel magazine called her "Germany's toughest woman boss" last week while other publications identified her as leading a "counter-revolution" in the workplace by championing a return to traditional German values of discipline, hard work and rigid punctuality.

Miss Mair, 30, who has been running her Cologne-based advertising and web design company for less than four years, has propelled herself into the limelight through the publication of a controversial new book, Schluss mit Lustig (End the Fun). In it she delivers a withering attack on what she sees as the American-inspired "enjoyable" approach to work that dominated Germany's now shattered internet-based industry during the mid-1990s.

Wednesday, October 22, 2003

Born Mag project

I'm working on a new Born Magazine project, in their Birthing Room.

Discovered this whilst looking at others' work.
I find it oddly uplifting.
About the Other Animals.

Monday, October 20, 2003

letter to the sports editor

Hey look, I made the Orlando Sentinel.

the Orlando Sentinel's NBA columnist

Brian: Can you please not put in [the] extra words that are missing from [Orlando Magic rookie Turkish(?) Center's] Zaza Pachulia's quotes? It makes it harder to read and way lowers the comedic effect. I'd rather read the quote and feel like I'm hearing him. Are your readers really unable to understand him without [these] things?

Miguel Caballero, Orlando

Miguel: I [do] not know what you mean.

Friday, October 17, 2003

Gators to tackle hogs

Florida linebacker Channing Crowder tries to corral a pig at a farm near Gainesville


After catching a pig, Channing Crowder (right) tries to dress it in a UF jersey while teammate Marcus Thomas holds it.


Thursday, October 16, 2003

Make your own football!

Hey, I did this. It's an ad.

Wednesday, October 15, 2003

From 'The Untouchables'

I want this guy dead! I want his family dead! I want his house burned to the ground! I want to go there in the middle of the night and piss on his ashes!

95 years... (commentary, various sources)

"My first thought was, 'I pray to God that guy isn't a Cub fan,'" Marlins pitcher Carl Pavano said.

This isn't one loss to overcome. This is all of Cubs history to overcome, all the voodoo and heartbreak and plain bad luck. Game 6 tied it up in a nice package for the Cubs.

The manager of the Florida Marlins also saw it. He is 72 years old and has seen quite a bit in this day. But even Jack McKeon had to admit: "I never saw an inning in the playoffs like that in my life."

'That fan saved our season,'' Castillo said now, looking up at the television. ``Moises would have had that....On the bench, the Marlins started saying to each other, ``Now let's make that fan famous.''

And they would. Infamous. That fan is now the least popular figure in Chicago since either Al Capone or Mrs. O'Leary's cow. Fans showered him with beer and debris as he wept, and the Marlins were genuinely worried for his safety afterward.

''I just hope that fan got out alive,'' Derrek Lee said.

Said Conine: ``You can't believe in a game this big a Cubs fan would do something like that. You'd think they'd all clear out.''

This was a sequence you couldn't have contrived in your sickest, darkest moment,

"Interfering with the ball is not a crime. It's stupid but not a crime,'" said Police Cmdr. Sam Christian.

Tuesday, October 14, 2003

Yankees vs. Red Sox Fans

many, many priceless tings in this article. read it.

Thursday, October 09, 2003

don't eat that banana


don't eat that banana.

Right Field Sucks

Right field *does* suck.

Wednesday, October 08, 2003

String Cheese Incident - Hepatitis A

From Pitchfork .

I hope Chewy went and got himself vaccinated. Story follows:

Traveling String Cheese Incident Fans Spread...Er, "Share" Hepatitis
Dick cheese incident another health matter entirely

[Posted Wednesday, October 8th, 2003 04:00:00 Pitchfork Central Time]

Ashford Tucker reports:
According to the Houston Chronicle, Washington Times and, loads of silly jerks who follow the reprehensible shitgrass band The String Cheese Incident from town to town are spreading (ummm...we, like, prefer "sharing" to "spreading," dude) the hepatitis A virus at an alarming rate. Though not quite a full blown social epidemic just yet, the Center for Disease Control in Atlanta states that it will focus on vaccinating "kids who travel with the band."

Vaccinations were given for free at the band's recent Oakland, CA concert. Hepatitis A causes nausea and vomiting for approximately a week or two. It's not usually life-threatening, though, unlike its bad motherfucking older brother hepatitis B. And hepatitis C, you remember, is what Pam and Tommy gave each other and then tried to play off as the result of a tattooing accident.

The A strain of hepatitis, in fact, is not generally found in nations with developed sanitation systems. It's not so much a needles-and-sex-virus as it is a wipe-ass-with-hand-while-drinking-from-the-Ganges-virus. So, moms and dads, tell little Billy to take a freakin' bath every week or so while on "tour." Or don't-- I mean, if Billy liked listening to you, he probably wouldn't be an acid-devouring gypsy wasting away the most productive years of his life running away from you and sleeping in friends' Vanagons.

In closing, we here at Pitchfork would like to beg all of the simple fucks involved to begin a rigorous regimen of warshing before they resurrect the bubonic plague and plunge us back into the dark ages. I'm not sure the Arab world would bail us all out again.

Tuesday, October 07, 2003

Mike Ward, we hardly knew ye

cue Arpeggio for Strings on the kazoo...

Hart threw me something like 7 parties when I was leaving town the first time. In some ways, Ward's goodbye will be like a pre-func for all of our funerals, so we should live it up.

-miss you already, ward.

on writing, from a recap of wrestling

"When he pinned Jericho, it was that perfect combination of unexpected and plausible all at once, and that convergence is when you can see guys break out and work their way up the card."

that perfect combination of unexpected and plausible all at once...

Monday, October 06, 2003

Make artwork, live artwork

Met Morrison last Wednesday night at Niki Polyocan's show at Disjekta(sorry, no link that i could find. but go check it out, nonetheless). This is from work appearing at Newspace, a gallery in SE. And apparently, there's a SE Portland First Friday, which just so happens to coincide with Uncasual Friday(more on that later.)

Nice moody shots. Take a look here.

Observations: the world going by - D. Morrison Lyman

Also showing will be the photographs of D. Morrison Lymann, who is based in Chicago, IL. Her ultimate goal is to live artwork and make artwork, and to share an open idea exchange with others.

"Observations: the world going by", is Morrison's most recent body of work and uses light to show the simple beauty of otherwise unspectacular day-to day moments. The ideas of travel and mood are addressed quietly through windows, windshield, and mirrors. These images were shot intermittently over several years, resulting in a series that celebrates living a visual life. A departure from more figurative work, these photographs speak of sadness, gratitude, and reflection.


From KEXP (and you should listen to John in the Morning via their site).

This may look like the same old battle, but there are unknown forces at
play. A predictable strategy could be your downfall. The stars give you
fresh license to transform yourself. Now get out there, grab your He Man
costume and scream "I Have the POWER!" in every circumstance possible.

Bacardi & Cola

I think my friend John Davis had something to do with this.

Bacardi & Cola . Time to come clean is the best episode.

Average daylight hours

Portland, OR July: 4:22am-10:00pm - 17 hours 36 minutes
Portland, OR December7:43am-4:29pm - 8 hours 46 minutes

Total difference: 8 hours 50 minutes.

source, here.

Friday, October 03, 2003

5 types of Portlanders

Thanks to Sean for getting me out of the house and rooting for the Cubs and blogging again and all.

Funniness here in the Portland Mercury.