Birthday

33 in 90 minutes, playing online poker, drinking red wine and wrestling on the tv.

i wonder why i'm depressed.

this is the first birthday where i've actually felt bad at its arrival. it's more the rush of time and how close 43 is that upsets me. am i going to be in the same position i am now in 10 years?

10 years ago, I had a kinda mediocre birthday. i'd just been laid-off from Chernoff/Silver in South Carolina, and was biding time at my folks house in Orlando. i was temping at an awfully boring job. but i was having a semi-love affair with Lara from SC. brilliant girl.

i think it was right around this time that I saw my first movie on my own - the Usual Suspects. guessed the ending, because i'd yet to foul my body with the drugs.

anyways, it's amazing that a decade has passed. will try to assess at some point. not now. not feeling good about it.

cue Friday's waitresses singing Happy-Happy-Birthday...

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