magellan is back.

i love this colulmn and i love Andrew W.K. and i love you, dear reader.

RollingStone.com: News: Well Hung at Dawn 13:32
To help shore up our moral constitution at a festival crowd that just gets younger every year -- maybe it's us! -- we're instituting the Well Hung at Dawn "three zit test." It's a very simple rule -- if she has three zits or more, she's too young to ogle.

13:34
Then again, the English are particularly spotty. Better make it five. And speaking of ogling, we've just now learned of the British male teenagers' fave new pastime: Thongspotting.

13:40PM
Andrew W.K. screws up our timing by taking the stage early. We almost miss our favorite song, the one about the party. By the time we get into the heart of the crowd, beer, water and bog roll are flying everywhere. You'd think these campground kids would want to hold onto the latter.

13:45
"She is beautiful! She is beautiful! She is beautiful!" That song makes us want to play video games.

13:52
It's been said before, but we don't mind repeating someone else's line: You can't spell "RAWK" without Andrew W.K. He dances like Jarvis, thrashes like Mercyful Fate and is generally the antidote to all things Bizkit. As the man himself says, "It's not stupid, it's not corny. Life goes by too quick, we're gonna have some fun . . . now let me ask you all a question: Are you happy? Are you happy?!" Fuck yeah! Andrew W.K. is the spirit of Reading. Andrew W.K. is God.